Albania. Return to the nineties.
My good friend collects countries. There are already about eighty visited countries in his collection. True, his passion for travel has some strangeness. He loves very, ahem, unusual countries. Let's say he was in Honduras, in Uganda, in Myanmar, in Syria, but he was not in Greece. And last year he spent his vacation in Albania and talked about it so deliciously that I caught fire to repeat his feat.
The main difficulty was that it was very difficult to get to the resort (Saranda) checked by a friend. By plane to Belgrade, there is a transfer to a plane to Tirana, and then 9 hours by car along broken mountain roads. This didn't suit me at all. I began to look for other ways and found. Direct flight to Corfu, and then an hour by ship to Saranda. Everything is great and relatively inexpensive. I already started planning a trip and suddenly it dawned on me - if I'm already on such a wonderful island as Corfu, then why the hell should I go to some kind of dumb Saranda?
Of course, the option to stay in Corfu won, but, damn it, I also collect countries (I have fewer of them. Only 33) and it was simply necessary to add such a pearl as Albania to the collection.
Now I will explain why Albania is a pearl. There are unusual countries, there are strange ones, there are caricature ones. But Albania stands apart. Let's say that today's North Korea, in comparison with Albania of the period 1945-1990, is an example of democracy, freedom and prosperity. Here are some facts. After the war, the country was headed by Enver Hoxha. Chel is strange, gloomy and intricate. Under him, all religions were banned and Albania became a country of general atheism. He also banned beards. He also maintained contacts with only three states - with the USSR, China and, for some reason, with Romania. Then he also broke all ties with the USSR and China and Romania remained. Just imagine how the Albanian Foreign Ministry worked if their only ambassador was in Bucharest. And that is all. Complete isolation. It is clear that such a situation has led the country into monstrous poverty and backwardness. For example, at night, only the square in front of Enver Hoxha's palace was illuminated throughout the country. But that is not all. This uncle seemed to be paranoid. And he ordered the construction of small defensive bunkers throughout the country in case of an invasion of the bourgeoisie, communists, zombies and alien homosexual robots.
So. The population of Albania is 2.800, 000 people. How many of these bunkers were built? Guess.
A thousand? Ten thousand? One hundred thousand? And here is the fig. All the Kims put together, Bokassa, Doc Duvalier and Pinochet together could not repeat the madness of Hoxha. Bunkers were built 700.000 (Seven hundred thousand). One for four inhabitants of the country, including babies and infirm old women.
In short, the entire population of Albania built these bunkers. What they lived and what they ate is not clear.
Now Albania in writhing is selected from the delusional past. Saranda was built on the site of a tiny fishing village. They are building an airport nearby. Italian specialists were invited to study tourism. In short, another year or two and Albania will turn into an average, poor coastal country.
Ships of several companies go to Albania. I was lucky to buy a ticket in one of the best. Just in case, I'll tell you where the office with the cashier is. Drive past the port. He and the sea to your left. After 300 - 500 meters you see a bright sign of a sex shop.
Good place, but not here. Walk another 10 meters and see such a nondescript shop window. This is it.
The ticket costs about 40 E. 3 flights there and 3 flights back per day. Tickets are valid for any of these flights. You need to arrive at the port an hour and a half before departure. Parking at the port is not recommended. My friend and I (my wife refused such an adventure) arrived in 40 minutes and ran into a huge queue at passport control. When there was one minute left before the departure of the ship and we decided that we were late, a kind aunt approached us, who sold us tickets and said that we would not be nervous. The ship will wait for us.
And he waited. 25 minutes. At first I couldn't understand why. And when I got on board, I understood. There were 12 passengers in total. And the two of us made up a significant part of this number.
Here is the crowd on the upper deck.
Lower saloon.
Upper saloon.
It's true that there were more people here than below. A tired Afro-Albanian was sleeping here.
It's all weird. The fact is that the neighboring ship was clearly overcrowded, and the Rocket even sank a little.
Crowded ship in the background.
But so much the better. I sniffed with a cheerful first mate.
And he invited us to the bow of the ship, where there was a veranda with long chairs for first-class passengers, and here it is Albania.
At the Albanian passport control, everything went quickly and without strain.
Leaving the city, we immediately took a taxi and asked the taxi driver to just take us to interesting places. Taxi Mercedes of course. And in general, 90 percent of the street traffic is Mercedes, for the most part from the heyday of the Modern Talking group.
Many, being in Corfu, book an excursion to Albania. I absolutely do not recommend. Firstly, it is expensive, and secondly, the main place to visit is the local botanical garden. Does it make sense to spend time and money to look at Christmas trees, sticks and cones that are no different from those in Corfu.
A taxi driver took us to an ancient fortress. Well, it's so-so, but it's still better than plants.
Moreover, there are all sorts of different old guns.
And, most importantly, a dazzling view of the sea, Saranda and Corfu.
I can hardly imagine what the then Albanians felt when similar liners passed their impoverished shores on the way to the sparkling port of Corfu, visible from here.
After the taxi tour, we walked along the embankment. Feelings of deja vu. Alushta sample of the nineties. There are many similar hotels that position themselves as super-duper 10 stars.
Inexperienced Albanians believe because it's much cooler than Albany's grandmother's armored bunk.
Even a mosque has been built in the city, but the Olbans are indifferent to religion. We saw only a couple of girls in religious clothes and, judging by their faces, they felt out of place. Like a hippie in Lyubertsy.
The people on the promenade are mostly local. There are very few foreigners. This is for now. In a year the airport will be completed and everything will change. But the locals are very colorful. There are no raspberry jackets (heat), but there are anchor gold chains on the collars. Ladies with handbags that have Gucci's metallic patch on them, bigger than the handbag itself.
These are the most decent bags that we met in Albania. Made in Turkey.
And on the clothes of the ladies there are large inscriptions such as Paca Raban, Dolce Gaban and other Capacoban.
Everything is familiar. All this passed.
But I wanted to see Albany, so to speak, deep, and I decided to rent an ATV. And here is the ambush. For renting a simple Korean quadra for 4 hours, they asked me for 80 E.
It's ok.....It's 480 E per day. For that kind of money you can rent a Porsche in Corfu. A square there costs 20 E. per day. But, realizing that Albany happens once in a lifetime, I, after the most severe bargaining, signed the contract. (They also took a passport as a pledge. Also a reference to the nineties. )
/// Izv. I will share the pain. I am an avid quad rider. I even have the rights of a Tractor Driver-Machinist, which give the right to drive an ATV in Russia. Taught kids how to drive. In short, a fan. But the neighbors call my dazzlingly beautiful, powerful, all-passable quad - trandychalka. Tolerable. The wife calls him a brat. On the edge, but forgivable. And then, when my friend and I arrived at the wild seashore, she said - take a picture of me. with this bullshit. Ebolda.......Fuck... Oh. l. . Yes. Probably, when a woman tells a man that he has a small pussy, this man has fewer experiences than I had. ////////
The wild beach was harsh. The seemingly soft, but actually razor-sharp rocks made swimming a bit extreme.
But we went swimming anyway.
Then we went to the bay, where the restaurant was located not even from the nineties, but from the seventies. A long dull canopy for 800 people. We ordered a sea cocktail. They brought this bullshit.
Yesterday's deep-frying oil. Bottom sauce.
Disgusting. And then I remembered that on the way I saw some farms in the salt lake. After telling the waiter that I want the products of these farms, I got this.
Amazing. And for three rubles.
Then we returned to Saranda. Rented a square. Moreover, when they checked the trunk, they found someone's thong. The renter said it wasn't his and put them in my shirt pocket.
We went shopping. For some reason I exchanged euros for local lei. In vain. They take currency everywhere. (Nineties. Remember) In the supermarket, I tried to find at least something made in Albany. Figo. Canned fish - Thailand. Meat - Italy. Sweets - Greece. ( Nineties)
But then I found something that reconciled me with A..... Albania.
It was such nostalgia that I almost cried. And, to be honest, he laughed non-stop.
But there are different opinions here. The fact is that in Albany, such magical drinks are sold in stores. Well, I grunted a little. Well, it struck a little hee-hee.
This photo was posted for tourist and local history purposes. In no way promotes any bad things and does not try to offend anyone's feelings.
As a result. If you find yourself somewhere near Albany, then hurry to visit it. This is the outgoing nature. A little more and the country will turn into something faceless and globalized.
/ Olbania is an intentional mistake. There was such a site in the nineties, from where almost all Internet erratives came from. Ya krevedko, damn bear, drink yada, kill yourself up the wall, padonag, pelodko, stopizztsot, squalid, afffftar zhzhot, animal in Bobruisk, and, of course, undying - learn Albany
Albanians are trying to match.... Well, so far.
