Tourists - tightrope walkers
Miracle: Four African Country Tour Namibia - Botswana - Zimbabwe - Zambia March 3-17.2017
Travel notes
Tourists are balancing act
The self-will, non-fulfillment of the program of the tourist route by foreign tour operators has become a byword. Not many of them try to fulfill "from" and "to", conscientiously work out everything that the tourist paid for, which is included in the Program, annex to the Agreement. Most prefer to save energy and money to pinch off the public pie: who is more, who is less. Well, if the stolen piece is equal among the others. But when they grab the lion's share - you must admit, it's a shame for the state. Although at first nothing bad was planned on our route. But then the day of the trip to Fish River Canyon comes - and we pass by like plywood over Paris.
Why? tourists were outraged. - Here it is written in the Program: “The famous Fish River Canyon, the second largest in the world. On the way, visit the "Giant's Playground", a cluster of huge stones stacked like children's pyramids, a mysterious forest consisting of trees of the aloe family, the name of which was given by the Bushmen, who use tree branches as quivers.
The outrage is more than justified. Even the giant stones and the mysterious forest are pitiful. And the Canyon is really a wonder of the world, equal to the Grand Canyon of America. Actually, the entire route rested on two "pillars": Victoria Falls and this Canyon. But the waterfall is already a different state. In Namibia, there is only one tourist attraction of world importance - namely Fish River Canyon. And is it being taken out of circulation? It's like pulling the Earth's axis out of our planet. But what about patriotism, pride in one's native country? In my opinion, in Namibia, every single person from young to old - especially tourist organizations - should, like hell for a sinful soul, cling to the greatness of their homeland - the Canyon. Be sure to include it in any itinerary. Because it really is not even a national treasure, but of the whole world. The main beacon for any tourist of any country. Your obedient servant, in fact, because of the Canyon, agreed to go to Namibia, because I already know the waterfall well. So the guide of the Namibian tour operator "Makalani Travel" Rimma, excluding the Canyon from the Program, cut the branch on which not only herself and her company sit, but the whole of Namibia. Of the two wheels, one was knocked out and the tourists were sent on their way on the only one. You can still move around in a gig, but how is it on one if you are not a tightrope walker? And I, as already mentioned, was generally left without wheels. In the full sense of the word: "I looked back - only knitting needles are lying. " (All other objects are of very small, local importance). So why did they throw it away? And on the head.
- Yes, you are tormented to go there, a thousand kilometers. Many tourists complained that they were tired when we drove them there, - without blinking an eye, Rimma “explained” the shortening of the route. Then, apparently, feeling the precariousness of such an explanation, she decided to give a more compelling argument: - Actually, make claims against your Moscow tour operator Mirakl and its director Ivan, he gave us such an alignment.
The right… to disenfranchisement
Rimma's reference to "Miracle" and its director Ivan, by the way, was already the second time. The first one was highlighted even more original. The fact is that, for medical reasons, the most favorable place on the bus for me is next to the driver. For almost eight decades, he managed to pick up as many sores as he could not get, perhaps from the whole group. By the way, the place is very unsafe in case of an accident. In my travels, I have seen broken, overturned buses on the side of the road many times. Passengers in the cabin will suffer, but remain alive. Even the driver will be the first to notice the danger and have time to somehow prepare. And sitting next to him - no options: instantly, along with the windshield, it will fly forward with all the ensuing consequences. In addition, in the summer you have to sit in this place like in an oven, since the windows on all sides simply heat up and there is no shadow like in the cabin. But not only medical indicators push me to this place. Another purely journalistic addiction. After all, for 66 years I have not let go of the pen. And even though now no one has paid me anything for this for a long time, I still write. For free. Like a blinded horse I walk in a circle. But in order to write well, you need to collect as much information as possible, to see.
In short, with all this I'm going to the director of "Miracle" Ivan. Like, is it possible to somehow officially secure this place for me, since there are still competitors. “No, ” Ivan replies, “it's illegal. Everyone pays the same money, therefore, everyone is equal among themselves. Whoever sat down where first, that's the place. So I run a race with competitors. Often the younger ones are distilled. However, this time he still managed to sit next to the driver, who turned out to be Rimma herself (by the way, she did not mind this). Even drove next to her to the hotel. However, the next morning, for some reason, Rimma changed her mind and demanded that I make room for another. Allegedly, the director of "Miracle" Ivan ordered so. But why didn't she say anything earlier, back at the airport? “And why not. I myself have the right to transfer tourists as I see fit, ”Rimma answered, as she snapped. Although this is an obvious arbitrariness, he did not argue, do not start the trip with a scandal.
It's none of your business
But it didn't end there. A day later, Rimma demanded to make room for another from another woman. Ivan ordered again? But he told me something completely different. Apparently, given my bad experience with Rimma, the woman who had been taking her place for a day already turned directly to the applicant:
- Why do you want to take my place, because we are all equal, paid the same money.
- No, I paid more.
- To whom? - instantly worked my journalistic instinct.
The applicant, realizing that she had blurted out, was taken aback at first, then she was immediately found:
- None of your business!
How did dad admonish Chichikov in "Dead Souls": "Everything... you will break a penny in the world"?
It's Chubais' fault
There were a lot of interesting things on the trip, there is not enough space for everything. For example, Rimma persuaded us to stop by for the night to her good friends (they are friends at home) the owners of the ranch. Like, the hostess, as a friend, will cook us a local dish of a young lamb. And the hostess, apparently, really, out of friendship, served steaks on the table... from the sole (zebra meat, the same horse meat, and even old, all of the sinew). Such a “creation”, with all the desire, will not gnaw and chew even a young one. We have the whole group from 50 to 80 years old inclusive. Or here's another. One and a half hours only one way on a huge motor ship (why rent one for 15 people in order to wind up more money from a tourist? ) We sailed to the rookery of seals - and immediately turned back without even slowing down. Well, why not land the tourists ashore for a walk and take pictures with the cats? Shall we disturb the animals? Lies! Animals will accept a person if he does not harm them. In addition, almost a million seals have accumulated on this multi-kilometer spit, they have already become serious competition for local fishermen. Therefore, seals are now being shot in droves. Shouldn't tourists be allowed in? Chubais again, sorry, is Ivan from Miracle to blame? Oh, this ubiquitous Ivan! Straight wand - a lifesaver for Rimma. Apparently, he, and not Rimma, canceled another object: a visit to “the largest fur seal rookery in South Africa in Cape Gross” (as it is written in the Program). And also due to the "fault" of the same Ivan, they did not see "basalt slabs, known as" organ pipes ". Or “a flat-topped mountain, named for its black limestone base and the kaleidoscope of dolomite colors from black to red, giving the impression of a burnt mountain. ” And also "the rock art of ancient people, numbering more than 2000 rock paintings, the largest rock art in Namibia, taken under the protection of UNESCO. " (Quoted - everything from the Program, everything that they say: “It flowed down the mustache - it didn’t get into the mouth”). Etc. etc.
On the obstacle course
Dear gentlemen tourists! Before you go on the route, do not be lazy, ask what kind of road you will have. For example, almost a third of us turned out to be unpaved over rough terrain with many ravines, which immediately fill with water at the slightest rain. Nevertheless, we were given a bus of a purely urban type, suitable only for transporting workers on asphalt within the city: low-power, with one drive axle and a draft of no more than ten centimeters. In short, they got stuck out of the blue, and returned back, even passing in front of a stream, where they would immediately sit on the bottom. We lost a lot of time, and most importantly, did not have time to see many objects from the Program. So, citizens tourists, learn about the road all at once. Even if you don’t get a suitable transport, at least, unlike us, you will be ready for all sorts of surprises in advance.
Two words about the route in general. I don't think it's the right time for him. The rainy season is already over, but not quite. The rain, although brief, still watered us almost every day. Therefore, water everywhere at least fill up. To get drunk, at the disposal of the animal around the mass of puddles, just lower your head. Naturally, all of them in both reserves (Etosha and Chobe) migrated far into the bush, away from the rivers and tourist roads along them. The same is true in the protected rivers Okavango and Chobe, along which we also swam. The water level in them is now two meters above the ordinary. And from the rivers, the animals also went to the water meadows away from the roads with annoying tourists and their smoking and rattling toys. So, we practically did not see animals that usually teem in nature reserves, especially predatory cats. Only the sick or the old remained “at home”.
They say that chickens are milked in Moscow (proverb)
They say that in South Africa, after the death of the great African Nelson Mandela, the attitude of "blacks" to "whites" has deteriorated sharply. (God forbid anyone suspect the slightest negative in the word “black”. For me, a person of any skin color and religion has always been and will be, first of all, a person initially equal to any one of his kind). But judge for yourself. International airport in Johannesburg. The attendants are only natives. When checking luggage before boarding a plane to Frankfurt, I forgot my watch in a drawer. When I remembered, to be honest, I immediately said goodbye to them. To whom and what I will prove, especially not knowing not only the local language, but even English. Besides, it's his own fault. Don't yawn, Cossack, that's what the fair is for. What has fallen is gone. However, journalistic itch drove forward. That is, back. I found a young man who checked my hand luggage, I explain the question on my fingers. Immediately, the swindler, I understood the essence, but shrugged his hands as if according to that saying: I don’t see anything, I don’t hear anything, I won’t tell anyone anything. In short, I didn’t take it - and that’s it. But I was more outraged by the fact that, at the same time, he was impudently, with a grin, pointing at my pockets and my carry-on bag. Watch, they say, you have. I find the senior control officer, officer Nkutu M. M. . And - oh, a miracle! Nkuta M. M. didn't wave it off. But he acted harshly: he called a policeman, a woman who again let my hand luggage through a tomograph, and me through a metal detector frame. It is clear that if they found my watch, they would immediately arrest me as a swindler. And I'm sorry - goodbye, dear little side. Looking ahead, I’ll say that hand luggage has fallen out of my sight more than once for all the time. Quite someone, the same young man with shifty eyes, could put a clock. But the woman - a policeman and Mr. Nkuta M. M. , even if the young man had such an idea, did not allow it to come true. Although the risk, of course, was. But journalism has never been without risk. I agree: "Normal heroes always go around. " In short, I did not have a watch, and Mr. Nkuta M. M. continued the investigation. I was photographed, the image was sent to the previous clothing control at the entrance to the airport. In order to confirm whether or not I had the ill-fated watch with me. Apparently, the answer came in the affirmative. Mr. Nkuta M. M. made a few more calls and walked with me through the floors. And what do you think? We found the clock with him at one of the points where a grinning young man with shifty eyes, apparently, managed to smuggle them. So my journalistic faith in humanity was once again confirmed, and Mr. Nkuta M. M. defended the honor of Johannesburg International Airport. And this is worthy of admiration for him and those who spared no time and effort for this.
PS: My bus neighbor once tried to resent the non-observance of the route and immediately received Rimma in the horns: “So that I no longer hear reproaches addressed to me. If there are claims, in writing to the company, I will pass it on. The neighbor did not write. I had to do it. If not me, then who? And on the way, someone (perhaps the same bus neighbor) still got through to the director of Miracle Ivan and complained about the exclusion from the Canyon Program. Having learned about this, Ivan immediately gave the command to compensate for the loss by paying us a safari in the Chobe National Park at the expense of the company. Ah yes Miracle, yes Ivan. Know ours! And yet it is a pity for the Canyon. Because I will never see him again. Going on purpose is too far and expensive. Vladimir Antonov