Неоднозначно Ambiguous

Admiral Spa Slavske...... Let's go for a promotion at a special price. Therefore, my review is relatively calm. If you had paid the full price stated by the hotel, the review would have been devastating. So, for the action:
With a coupon for 3950 UAH. two people get the opportunity to relax 8 days / 7 nights in the "Standard" rooms in the "Admiral-SPA" Complex in Slavske, the original cost is 8120 UAH! ---- Where this cost is taken from is not clear (there is archery, and billiards, and sun loungers, which almost no one uses. The cost is clearly cunningly overpriced. And, apparently, real without a discount).
Number indicated in the promotion:
Rooms of the Standard class with an area of ​ ​.17 sq. m. have a standard set of furniture: one double or two single beds, work desk, satellite TV/radio, bathroom with shower, heated towel rail.

Nowhere in the description of the promotion is indicated: the standard is a "chicken coop" under a roof with a sloping ceiling, beds in niches, NO BALCONY, NO AIR CONDITIONER, NO FRIDGE, NO kettle in the room. There are also practically no windows, because. it is located under the ceiling, just tiny and it is IMPOSSIBLE to ventilate the room (EVEN) THROUGH IT. Not to admire the views of the Carpathians. There are no 17 m there and not close - a maximum of 8 m and then with a stretch: a hanger door (there is no wardrobe either, only 3 hangers on a hanger) - a table and 2 beds under a sloping roof. Beds creak wildly. There is practically no water: either boiling water or cold water flows in a thin stream (depending on whether the neighbors visit the toilet when you are trying to wash your hair). The bathroom smells of dampness, it is impossible to ventilate it, because. there is no window in the room. The ceiling (beveled, which you hit your head all the time) is lined around the entire perimeter of the chipboard, which is not allowed in residential premises, because The glue contains formaldehyde. Here it is around the entire perimeter of the room.
Cleaning: None. Immediately the administrator warns that they clean ONLY upon a specific request. Garbage is not taken out, you need to run for toilet paper, to wipe the dust or vacuum (since the carpet has been laid) there is not even a question. Asked to take out the trash - be kind - sit for hours in the room and wait for the maid when she comes.
Meals: well........it seems that you eat in a canteen, everything is seasoned with margarine, the portions are large, but without fiction and a stupid combination of dishes. Example: 2 sausages + boiled egg + mayonnaise + ketchup + vermicelli, topped with melted cheese + bread. It seems that there is something to eat, but a strange combination. Breakfast on the day of arrival and dinner on the day of departure are not included in the price: i. e. you will have to buy the above complex for 60 UAH (! ). Yes, the prices are very high: borsch - 30 UAH, dumplings - 30 UAH, etc. And there is no alternative: only there is Smerichka nearby, but the cuisine there is very weak and not tasty, and the prices are the same. There is nowhere else to eat! Even if you bring from the store - there is NO refrigerator in the room, there is nowhere to store it. In general, you won’t be hungry, but you won’t be able to eat at a restaurant...
Territory: the pool and jacuzzi are definitely dirty, the water even looks dirty and cold (in the pool), there was no desire to visit them. An artificial pond - the same thing - stagnant water with a fountain-waterfall..... Sauna - good, they heat well and honestly, but again, then you need to go up to the pool area, through a damp, bad-smelling basement passage. You can also take a shower near the steam room, but it is damp, there is mold on the ladders and the smell of urine (sorry for the details).

NO entertainment. Wherever you are going to go - pay 50+50 UAH for a taxi (any direction, even 2 km - 50 UAH), otherwise you have to walk very far. The roads are nothing but holes. On excursions along these roads, riding is a complete extreme, chatting like a rollercoaster. We went by train to Lviv - we left in the morning, we arrived in the evening - it was very convenient and Lviv, of course, conquered for the umpteenth time. Well, you can also climb Zakhar Berkut (50 + 50-taxi + 100 climb). And that's all. All entertainment.
Wi-fi is very slow, sometimes just not, it only catches at the reception and then not always.
Separately, I want to say about the staff: here, of course, is the bright spot of the trip. Very friendly and well-coordinated team. Yes, they are not professionals, no one teaches them the rules, but as a human being they are very pleasant and friendly people. All. From security guards to administrator and waiters. There was a very pleasant impression from the staff. It is noticeable that the staff is small, it is not enough, the employees live right in the hotel and work around the clock. I would like to advise the management not to save on training and staff training. Moreover, the hotel declares itself as a hotel, and not rooms for "spend the night". So try to create hotel conditions, starting with cleaning the rooms. There are rules for hotels, right?
Special thanks to Lyuba the administrator and Svetlana the director, they are trying and it shows.
Summary: I definitely expected more from the Carpathians, this hotel in particular. Clearly overpriced for the room and the food and services offered. No entertainment. I will definitely not go to Slavske in the summer. If you are going to go here, do not take the standards! I haven't seen any others, so I can't recommend.
For management: the point is not to "catch up with the extras" for the action, the point is to create a reputation for the hotel with an advertising campaign. And the impression was that for each word declared in the action: