Всё об отдыхе В Турции или лучше куда не ездить вовсе. Starlife hotel 3*+ All about rest In Turkey or better where not to go at all. Starlife hotel 3*+

A hotel for lovers of hard-boiled eggs or Worse than a hotel I could imagine.
If you paid more than 60.000 rubles for a vacation trip, which you saved up bit by bit for a whole year, collecting every penny bit by bit and plowing at the same time in the smoky workshops of the plant, then naturally you dream of your future trip to Turkey only in colored paints. Beautiful sea, great beach, good hotel with friendly (namely friendly) staff, good, I emphasize! It is good (and not some kind of swill) food, albeit small but cozy rooms, a pool, well, something like that. My wife and I really loved trips to Turkey, but before this trip, after which I developed a persistent allergy to Turkey. It is thanks to this "wonderful" in quotation marks hotel. Thank You for This StarLife!

I'll start simple, with a meeting.

We flew out of Yekaterinburg on the evening of the 20th, and our tour, respectively, began on the 20th, as soon as we boarded the plane and flew off. According to international rules, as I was told at the reception of the Starlife hotel, check-in takes place at 2 pm and later, great! After all, my tour began on the 20th and we arrived at the hotel early in the morning on the 21st and they tell us that wait until two o'clock, while I had to check in yesterday at 2 o'clock in the afternoon, because I paid Pegasus for this day . This is where I got my first bad impression. Who fooled me? Hotel? Pegasus? Or both together? tSorry - these are my hard-earned money and I have the right to count them! Dear readers, digress from the topic, I still do not recommend this hotel to you just because THIS IS A COMPLETE ESTATE OF PEGASUS AND THERE IS NO COMPETITION HERE! THEREFORE THE SHADOW AND DISPATCH FOR EVERYTHING AND EVERYTHING!! !
Finally, having settled us with a view of the roadway and after much torment in a stuffy room at the reception, we went for lunch. Of course, I was struck first of all by the very atmosphere of the dinner. They brought in SOMETHING that looks like meat, but it's not meat at all - soybeans at best. Ho papa! The people rushed to the tray! Fly in! Grab more! Let others not have enough-on the side! On the other hand, the fact that 50% or more of what is grabbed into a plate, this individual will not eat and throw everything away, our people are greedy to the point of horror! Fly, Grab - that's our motto! Of course, there is no fault of the hotel here, but it's just like, and if you look at the root, then the fault is direct. Hungry people driven to despair! The struggle for survival, the struggle for an extra snatched piece, the struggle for a place at the table (especially at dinner), the search for forks and spoons, that's what the poor tourists are doomed to in this hotel. They grab a loaf of bread with dirty, unwashed hands, desperately cut it into pieces - darkness .... Yeah, I thought looking at the picture that opened up to me ... That's how it hit, that's how it hit .... !
So, I will now list the hotels that I have been to, and these are the Sunshine Hotel, Golden Lotus, Asdem Park Hotel, Seker Resort, and finally our famous Star Life hotel. I continue, in the hotels listed above, when entering the restaurant, there are beautiful chefs, in clean white turbans and clean white chef's suits, and they greet everyone who enters the restaurant, greet them, smile sweetly. You go to eat as if for another small holiday, I’m not deceiving you, dear readers, in all the hotels listed above it was like that and believe me, there were only “triples” and “fours” like our unforgettable Star Life, but for some reason in in other hotels this is the norm, it’s not clear why everything here is not the same as for people, and there are no normal ethical standards here and cannot be, but I’m answering you about this, all because this is the patrimony of Pegasus Tourism and there is no smell of any competition here .
Frustrated, and having found a free seat with my wife, I sat down on a chair and almost crashed to the ground along with this unfortunate chair, which is older than this hotel . . and while my wife is standing in line, and is also trying to snatch a piece in the crowd - funny right ... I decided to watch the servants. Yes. a. a. , their eyes burned, somehow sparkled, as people sparkle when they remember a funny anecdote or watch a funny comedy. Obviously not giving a look, they examined and quietly neighing, looking out quietly at the raging crowd trying to snatch something and looking for something edible for someone. Once again I repeat - fun and nothing more. Apparently this performance, repeated from day to day, amused them again and again.

And it’s understandable, because some “actors” played their role to the end and went home, and fresh, full of strength and energy new “actors” came to this part in this tragicomic performance and played their new, maybe even more funny or sad roles. Who knows ... who knows ... It turned out that my wife and I had to take part in this willy-nilly ... Wow resort, I thought, here's Grandma and St. George's Day. At this time, the wife filled the plates with something, and with a victorious look rushed to me, and interrupting my sad thoughts . . on the topic- (Why do I need all this, and what did my grandmother go for . . )

Part 2 Beach. After eating some sort of vodka, we went to the beach, artificially having fun and chirping, my friend of life tried to cheer me up. Walking to the beach is no more than five minutes, well, I think, walking along the path and not listening to my wife's twitter, I will lie down under an umbrella and sleep off the road ... Aha! Damn I guessed! Everything is jammed!
The main thing that struck me was the width of the beach line belonging to the hotel. I HAVE NOT SEEN THIS YET! WELL HERE . . WORD - I DID NOT SEE! The width of the beach line is no more than ten meters, I didn’t measure it with a ruler, but it will be ten meters! True, we must pay tribute to the hotel, the strip is not wide but long fifty meters and starts right from the drinking bowl and shower and all the way to the sea. In short, narrow and long, some kind of joke. The people are teeming, you can’t tell the hell where StarLife is and where Blue Sky is and where the Grand World is. Everyone was mixed up like herrings in a barrel. I looked to the left, and there the beach was empty of some ultra expensive club hotel, and empty! settled on pebbles . . away from the bustle of the world, silence, . . peace . . Thoughts immediately come to mind, why did I overpay? without food at all, than such an "All Inclusive" .....

Part three.

Snack time (snack in Russian . . ) Snack time, bish snack - all hotels have it, and here I read in the schedule what is present. Fine! We'll have a snack. At the appointed time, it seems at five o'clock we came to have a snack, because it is interesting what they will give. The crowd was already seated at the tables near the bar. A black and sweaty and fat Turk with a sly face kept playing for time and did not start a snack. He pulled for fifteen minutes, warming up the crowd for the competition "Who is faster. " Take out something and shout Start! The run has begun! Come on, grab it! Well number! Well fun! ! ! My wife succumbed to the general excitement, ran from the other side of the table, deceiving the first attackers with this technique and grabbed a few cookies! Hurrah! Victory! ! ! Let's drink tea! 3 minutes max and nothing! Record! We put it in the Guinness book.
I feel that I myself am beginning to perceive this mess and mockery of the dignity of a person, namely us, RUSSIANS with a capital letter, as the norm ... as fascists who are used to mocking prisoners in concentration camps. The wife is happy! Snack was a success! And I'm not happy, I'm sad about something ....

Let's have a cup of tea... part 4) In other hotels that we were lucky to visit, there were always cups and a lot of tea bags, choose what you want, black hot, green hot, or even raspberry or strawberry if you like. No, you don't have a choice. Everyone has a choice, but not the guests of Star Life. There are large teapots with tea leaves already brewed and re-brewed many times in order to save money. I'm watching . . I ran out of tea in the teapot, that is, tea leaves. At best, a Turk comes up and pours boiling water into this teapot again. It was he who succumbed, he poured himself! And then our cunning Russian aunts do not wait for the Turk, they themselves pour boiling water into the teapot again!
And they themselves drink this vodka which the tongue does not dare to call tea. And it’s good for the Turk, you don’t need to make an extra gesture, and the hotel has a freebie-saving tea leaves, and the aunts are happy, they’re sipping their “gulls” .... they’re sipping.


Part Five - Trying to drink coffee. This is another joke. I go to the miracle coffee machine. The kid knocks on him with his fist, well, in order to squeeze something out of this human creation. Useless! The door opens from blows, milk powder pours out from there, and the loose apparatus stayed in this form for a week. Nobody cared about the machine all week. Yes, there are no coffee cups here. Pour pseudo tea into a chemoplastic glass! Very intelligently thought out. And the cup will not be broken or stolen, and the glasses do not need to be washed. Everywhere calculation! Everywhere You Want to Inflate! And inflated the Devils! They made me refuse their tea. Saved on us again! I did not drink their vodka.
Kicked, jerked, splashed, it seemed to help, the bald cats fled, but not far, bad children are right there, let's catch them, moms, dads look at it with tenderness, I am amazed at such parents, in my head there is no mind or imagination! Well, God bless them = these are their problems, but I still couldn’t relax, I didn’t succeed in poking the buttons, I feel ... it hurts my legs ! ! ! OOO! Yes, there is a new attack! Red little ants! A string is already on the table, the bastards are biting! And you can’t move to another table, everything is already “crammed! I blew on them, blew, don’t put pressure on the table on which you will eat. I tell the waiter: “Remove the ants! “He’s laughing, he’s having fun! He gave me a towel, like brush it off. Well, he waved, waved, he seemed to win, the romantic mood gradually began to melt. Well, where is my little wife? cherished bottle of wine, so that he opened the cork for me, so he attacked me with a presentation!
Why don't you buy from me? What the heck?! ! ! As I wrote above, every person has a choice. And I made my choice myself and bought wine where I wanted, and not where someone tells me! I dance as I want for my money and no one can, even such a highly respected person in the hotel as a BARTENDER, tell me what and where to buy! Am I right? Isn't that right, dear readers? Well, thanks to the moralizing of the bartender, who is not unknown to us, the mood disappeared. Well, I think I’ll drink some overseas wine ... I’m sitting, I continue to wait for my wife who dresses up in a room for a “romantic evening”, and behind me sits a friendly family, Mom, Dad, and two children, I don’t remember their gender, and what’s the difference. I see the bartender running, walking towards the family and driving them off the table, that is, from their seats! That's the number! ! ! This is how they treat hotel guests! I haven't seen this yet! ! ! HE JUST PUSHED THEM FROM THE TABLE! ! ! The father of the family, as usual for a defender, went into denial. Then the waiter ran for help.
A short, bald man came running, speaking Russian well, while I want to note - EXTREMELY UNPLEASANT TYPE. He grabbed the father of the family by the elbow and began urgently, as if quietly shouting, otherwise it would be impossible to express this scene. Dear, free the table, Without any explanation of the reason! And where to release, everything is clogged everywhere. I tried to stand up for the family, so he yelled at me! And he said, like, shut up and it's none of my business. Well, the hotel .... I wanted to fill his face at that moment ... oh, how I wanted ..... The family left the battlefield with a loss (I can imagine how they felt in their souls) and the waiters fussed. As if by magic, a tablecloth, napkins, towels, cutlery, clean glasses appeared - beauty! Ahhh... so this is for the Specially Chosen Ones! This is not for the Russian cattle! Let them continue to fight for survival. But this institution, where they feed, as a rule, is called proudly RESTAURANT.

So what kind of restaurant is this, if you yourself scour this restaurant in search of plates, forks, docks. Why such disregard for hotel guests? Let those especially close to the emperor themselves run around in search of forks and knives. Dinner is called. Ramotized....

Part penultimate, our first breakfast. In the morning Beloved woke me up at dawn, and made me fucking go and "clog" a place on the sunbeds. So that if we come from the beach, we have places by the pool. There is nothing complicated in "clogging" a place, you take a couple of worthless items from home, such as old glasses, shorts, socks, and then throw them on the sunbeds you like. The rule works! Your beds! Nobody will attack them! I did some experience and instead of shorts (which I forgot in the room) put a couple of pebbles that I found right there nearby. The rule continued to work. There are pebbles on the sun loungers - no one will encroach on them!
Dear compatriots! Be more self-loving and self-respecting. Throw off nafig all these items and lie down on the sunbed. If I came to the beach and saw that some kind of nonsense was lying on a sunbed, like it was full, I would fucking throw it in the trash and then did not listen to any presentation. I don't give a damn, what a bunch of nerds, sunbeds were hammered, although I myself am like that. But this is a digression from the topic, and the topic is BREAKFAST. Psychologically, I was already ready for all sorts of surprises, but breakfast plunged me into a deep SHOCK! I am used to it and my Beloved, that usually in normal hotels (just in normal ones, Star Light does not belong to normal hotels) for breakfast there is a large selection of all kinds of pastries, poppy seed buns, jam buns, cheesecakes ... pretzels, . . all sorts of curls . . Well, you come, you collect all this goodness and stuff a wineskin (I'm talking about the stomach).

We also got used to with our missus that there is still a cook for breakfast and he cooks for you a choice of either scrambled eggs or scrambled eggs. Comrades! Citizens! After all, it's elementary! Egg or omelet! O1 It was complete gloom! O! you'll die of hunger here! There are no amlets here! There are no eggs here! About rolls of all stripes - forget forever ! ! ! There are always hard-boiled eggs, DELICIOUS SAUSAGES and olives of all kinds! The whole vacation in Turkey and in this hotel is like that, the whole vacation of the egg is cool every morning. Turn the cooks into scrap, let them eat what they give, otherwise it won’t happen, and what do you think? The oil was gone for several days, you can’t even call it oil, margarine-chesslovo, so they go to the drum managers, with nice smiles, like everything is under control . . And this is such a service for me for 60 thousand rubles !!!? ? ? I'm to a bald, Russian-speaking uncle with a question. so they say and so, Shaw for business? Where will the scrambled eggs be?
And he glared at me, glared not so kindly, broke into a cold sweat, well, I see, like he wants to kill me, well, he grunted, something like I’ll break the topic. But the topic has not been clarified. And I immediately wanted to go home, to the river . . to go fishing, to the dacha, to dig the beds, I began to count the days to the house. Rest here was completely ruined. SIMPLY DAMAGED IN DRAZG! Beer here is given in portions in small chemoplastic cups, cola, fanta or something else, the principle is the same, a lot of foam, little liquid! And this is saving on you, dear readers, your money has gone to the left! Now I'm allergic not only to Turkey but also to hard boiled eggs....

In conclusion, I would like to say the following. The feeling that I was "made for money" haunts me to this day.
I feel like a fucked-up sucker and a worthless husband, and all because I could not provide my Beloved with a decent rest, I could not protect my Love from this mess, sorrows and hardships that we had to come into contact with in this hotel, and in order to somehow smooth over the guilt before our With the Love of My Life, I succumbed to the persuasion of two of the most pleasant women - Khokhlushkas and barkers, and took my little wife to a leather shop, where I gave her the absolute opportunity to choose! And Thank God, she made this choice, and Thank God that once, in this crazy, crazy life, she chose me, SHE saw in me something that others do not have! And I am grateful to fate for this! And May God give you all such love as I have for her! And money? What money, I will go back to the factory and earn money, and I am grateful to the hotel for the school of survival, and now, if I find myself in the taiga, al in the desert, I will not be lost, and all this is thanks to the Star Life Hotel!

P. S.

I recommend the owner of the hotel to review the policy of treatment of hotel guests, and fire all employees who cause a negative rating. Otherwise, you will lose all customers. Tourists Sanya and Vanya. (that is, Russian tourists, Alexandra and Ivan from Yekaterinburg)